I write a lot about the psychology of job search.  For me it is one of the top keys to finding a job in this or any market.  If you have your head on straight, you come across differently than those who don’t.  Your mannerisms deliver you in a confident way.  You avoid the smell of desperation.

It allows you to focus less on over-pursuing job leads and more on pursuing with confidence the next wave of opportunities.

But even the most confident of us obsess a bit in job search.  Why?  Because “how is it possible that a smart person like me (with my background) isn’t being called for interviews”?  Once the job search moves into months not weeks, you start to wonder.  And wondering becomes worry. Especially if you begin spending your savings to fund your search.

So always having two or three warm leads is important.  That way what happens with one is less important.  As a result you are less often checking e-mail and more often busy doing something more valuable.  Author and blogger Tim Ferriss says to check e-mail twice a day.  At Noon and at 4:00 PM.  Give it a try.

How do you know if you are obsessing?

1. You are consistently going “off plan” to check in with a recruiter (for the fourth time that week).
2. You are continually e-mailing the HR team to see if they got your resume via Monster.
3. You have Outlook set-up to check for new messages every 5 minutes and to make a noise when they come in.
4. Your Blackberry is set-up to “blink red” when a new message comes in.
5. You berate the HR team for not seeing the value you offer to their organization

Of course this is all wasted time and, importantly, wasted energy.
If you are one of those folks checking e-mail every ten minutes, I have some thoughts for you.

1. Build a communication plan.  Decide who is in your job search network and then build an objective plan to confidently reach out on a periodic basis.  For the most part, try to avoid impulsive actions.
2. Change Outlook and Blackberry settings so that you are not “prompted” to check e-mail throughout the day.  No blinking lights and no “you’ve got mail” during job search (also a Ferriss point).
3. If you think you should call and follow-up with a recruiter, HR person or hiring manager.  Check your communication log if you have one.  More than once a week is too much.  If they want you, they will call.
4. On those days and weeks when you know your expectations will be high.  After a submission, after an interview, after a recruiter meeting.  Plan events, meetings and special projects around the house that will keep you busy.  Away from the e-mail.  Ideally when the call finally comes you will be relaxed with your head in the right place to accept whatever news comes your way.
5. In terms of your mindset, remember that your life is not on the line here.  While finding your next role is a big priority, your ability to balance this effort with other important things in life is also key.  Your role as a parent, spouse, uncle or friend.  Those roles can provide a great and highly rewarding distraction.  Just when you need it.